The irony of where Richmond Academy football Coach Keenan Grissett was headed with his family and the Labor Day phone call he received on his way there was surreal — and, in a way, almost cruel.
The first-year head coach was headed out with his wife and family to celebrate his oldest son’s 11th birthday when he received a phone call from a parent with unmistakable grief in her voice.
That phone call came from Se’Vonn Small’s mother. And it was about something much deeper than just a disgruntled parent calling to complain about a lack of playing time for their son.
“You could hear the distraughtness and the trembling in her voice,” Grissett said. “I didn’t know what was wrong, but you could just tell by the sound of her voice that whatever it was, it wasn’t something trivial. It was something really bad that had happened. Once she finally got herself together enough, she just came out and told me Se’Von drowned.”
By now, the 16-year old’s drowning death at Points West Army Resort in Appling has made the rounds through local news outlets — enough to where many know the basics of what happened, even without any affiliation with or intimate knowledge of ARC football.
But more than two weeks after the sophomore football player’s tragic demise, Grissett and his team are still slogging through all the emotions that come with the loss of a loved one.
“My heart stopped right there in the midst of traffic when I got that call,” he said. “It was an absolutely hard thing to deal with. First thing I yelled out was, ‘If I had practice that day, he wouldn’t have been at the lake.’ But then I was like, ‘That’s the selfish part, to go blame yourself and make it about you.’ Because it’s not about me. There’s a mom and a dad going through that. There’s nothing that I could be feeling that’s worse than what they were feeling in that moment. But it definitely makes you think of your own family. I tried to celebrate my son’s birthday that day, but in the back of my mind, I’m still thinking about a mom and dad who are mourning the loss of their son.
“It definitely makes you look at your own kids a little longer and hug them a little tighter.”
Grissett has tried to use football as a coping mechanism, both for his players and for himself. He can see his players struggling to push through the grief even during practices, but he also feels like football is helping them manage and channel their feelings into something constructive.
“I’ll be honest with you,” he said. “I think it’s still very, very heavy. I’d be lying to you to say that this is something we can just bounce back from quickly and move forward. You’re talking about losing a guy you share a locker room with and lifting weights with and practicing with. You’re talking about sharing real blood, sweat and tears with this guy, and then you lose that brother. That’s just something that you don’t easily bounce back from.”
The Musketeers have made a valiant effort, though. During a practice several days before the East Laurens game, Grissett and his staff were busy pushing their players beyond fatigue during wind sprints.
“You’ve gotta be able to perform even when you’re tired,” Grissett shouted out to them. “You’ve gotta be able to perform even when you want to quit.”
He realized in that moment that he was giving them instructions on something bigger than football.
“Obviously, those who were closer to Se’Vonn around his age group, it kind of hit them a little harder,” he said. “Older guys knew him, but those sophomores and freshmen — the ones who came in with him — they’re the ones who are really trying to fight through it. But what I’m proud of is those guys are still showing up at practice. They’re still showing up for the game. We’re not taking it as an excuse not to be here, but as you can see, I don’t think we’re all adjusted to the fact that we still have his presence here with us.”
Small will be missed by teammates as a friend and a brother, but Grissett said the coaching staff is also going to miss his coachable spirit as a player. He’s hoping his teammates will remember Small’s tenacity and try to emulate it.
“The worst thing we can do is come out here and lollygag and lazy around and send a message that we don’t really want to be successful out here,” Grissett said. “Because Se’Von was a kid who wanted it. He would ask questions. He was the kind of kid who wanted to be coached. He wanted the hard coaching. We have a handful of kids like that in our program, but I wish we had more.”
To date, Small’s death has been the culminating difficulty in a season that’s seen a myriad of challenges for an ARC program that’s already dealt with adjusting to an unexpected coaching change this summer and the transition — and, sometimes confusion — that comes with that.
Grissett feels like all of it is a part of something that’s much bigger than him.
“Everything with how I ended up as head coach and all of that is a whirlwind of a story, and some of the things that transpired, I’m not at liberty to speak about at this moment, but I’ll say I think it’s just God’s plan,” he said. “The things that happened to land me in this spot, was it ideal? Obviously not. Was it part of my personal plan to have to take that kind of a phone call from the mother of a player? Obviously not. But I think God puts us in places for a reason, and now that I’m here, I just want to be as positive of a role model as I can be for these young men.
“I want to be as much of a peer and colleague for our coaching staff and a beacon and hope of light for our school, program and community as much as possible, especially in a sensitive moment like this.”
On Friday, Richmond Academy will get back on the field for a football game for the first time in two weeks. They’ll travel to Lincolnton to face Lincoln County (2-2) in a final non-region tune up before playing at Morgan County on Sept. 29 to begin region play.
Beyond trying to play good football, Grissett said the team and program will do several things to help cherish Small’s memory and ensure that he won’t soon be forgotten.
His locker remains intact in the exact way it was left the last time he was there, and the school’s junior varsity team, on which Small was a starter, hosted a balloon release in Small’s honor just before a home JV game on Sept. 7.
Additionally, Grissett said the school would dedicate the football field to his honor by placing his number 43 in each end zone. The team is presented a framed jersey of his that will be signed by every member of the program’s staff, and “The 43 Fund” has been launched for people to donate to the family to help alleviate financial hardships that have come in the aftermath of Small’s death.
“Football was everything for Se’Vonn, so we would be remiss to not continuously play with a spirit of him still being with us,” Grissett said. “Every single day, we call his name on that roll, and every time we do, every man in that locker room says ‘here’ because we know he is still with us.”
